Comments on: Nice Guys

By: Dan

Dan — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 02:30:18 +0000

PS “True that”? Who are you, the Fresh Prince?

By: Dan

Dan — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 02:27:21 +0000

We have a guest here who works for Street Sense! She was actually the subject of one of the profiles in the recent December issue. She is GREAT! The folks at the local Metra station have never seen anything like her. She’s a dynamo. In addition to being a grandmother, she is a recovering alcoholic and meth addict. She has been clean for 2 years, and is really trying to turn her life around. Her daughter and son-in-law just finished meth treatment themselves. It’s pretty heartwarming to see a success story. Every once in a while, we need a positive outcome to keep us going. I think I’ll be crushed if she relapses. I certainly hope not.

By: Sam Scott

Sam Scott — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 19:56:30 +0000

True that. By the way, remind me to tell you about Street Sense in Chicago — it’s a street newspaper like Spare Change News in Boston for which I was editor-in-chief and executive director for a few years. It might be useful to your non-profit, and it’s a decent way to get some jobs for homeless people rather than have them rely on charity. Talk to me offline about it.

By: Dan

Dan — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 19:39:54 +0000

You see? All you have to do is figure out who you are, and what suits you the best, and the rest has a tendency to fall in line. Not perfectly, of course, and not easily, but if you’re comfortable with who you are and what you’re doing, your job will be much, much better.

By: Sam Scott

Sam Scott — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 19:37:35 +0000

Mike, you’re also correct. I think that the closer one works towards an/the owner in a small business, the more the owner just views you as a tool to increase profit as much as possible.

In corporate, middle-management, this is not the case. The manager is likely just a salaried shlub like you, so he is less, well, cold.

By: Sam Scott

Sam Scott — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 19:35:47 +0000

Dan, if you read the post to which I linked, you’ll find that I had a string of bad luck with horrible bosses.

Still, I agree with your point. A sympathetic HR manager told be — while my manager was in the middle of firing me for BS reasons — that my personality was perhaps best suited towards a start-up or running my own small business rather than towards corporate life. Three years later, I find that she was exactly right. My own consulting business has been going well so far — and I’m my own boss!

By: Dan

Dan — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 19:18:57 +0000

I think the key to having a successful relationship with your boss is to find out what type of job/career would best fit YOU. If you have had problems with your bosses in several different areas, perhaps the problem is not the bosses, if you know what I’m saying. First identify what career is going to be a best-fit for your interests, skills, and experiences. Once you do so, you will enjoy and be more skillful at the work you do, which will make you happier AND better at your job. If you are happy and good at what you do, you’ll be amazed at how well your relationship with your managers improves.

I know this from personal experience. I worked for 3+ years in the banking industry. I hated both of my bosses during that time. However, I remain friends with one of them to this day, outside of work. How is this possible? I didn’t really hate the bosses — I HATED THE JOB! I met with a career counselor, and we determined, through a series of meetings, conversations, skill– and interest-tests, and the like, that the best fit for my interests, skills, and experiences would be in a social-service non-profit environment. I took a leap of faith, and quit my job at the bank; within a couple of weeks, I was hired as an employee of a homeless shelter. I have been there 16 months (and counting!), and have never — NEVER — been happier. Are my bosses perfect? Of course not — they’re people, aren’t they? But does that bother me? No. Because I am happy with my career, and happy with who I am.

So here is my advice: figure out what YOU want, what will make YOU happy, and the workplace issues you have will seem to magically disappear. Do not focus on others; you can’t change them anyway. What you can change is what YOU do about it.

By: Mike

Mike — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 21:33:09 +0000

Sam — haven’t all your experience been primarily with the smaller end of the business spectrum where the boss in many cases was or near enough the same as the owner? I think this could be a very different environment than working for a larger corporation.

Also, the article does note that you need to be nice and demonstrate value. Value to your boss is what is going to get him recognition as well or lessen his worries in the workplace. Being nice means he wants to work with you on a daily basis. Without one or the other and you will be stuck in the same place for a very long time providing value without getting recognized or being the useless nice guy sitting in the corner.

By: Jeff Guevin

Jeff Guevin — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 19:23:12 +0000

Who says they’re ahead? Sounds to me like a term in desperate need of a definition.